How does the voice inside your head talk to you? You know the one you bounce ideas off and look to for suggestions in your lifes choices? The one who looks back at you from your eyes each morning? Are they helpful, a critic – positive or negative? We all have the voice inside who we look to for advice as its our “inner voice”. The one who can be your best friend or your worst enemy – depending on the day.
Many of us would go and talk to our friends, suggest they be nicer to themselves when they are negative. Make comments that cut and are cruel about themselves. Then we do the opposite – we go into our own inner critic slamming ourselves relentlessly for the mistakes we make and what a fool we are at times.
How we see ourselves is as changeable as the wind and weather! It can be hot as one day, freezing the next or storming within the same day. Our emotions and self talk can be as damaging as a hurricane with effects that last for years after the event is over. It’a time to say “stop – wait a minute?” You need to get the traffic lights out and get them working. Yes you will have go, get ready to stop and go.
A simple way to start improving your self talk is to see what thoughts run through your head daily. Pick one and use your traffic lights to control your thought. If its not productive and its slamming you, being relentlessly negative – stop it. Switch it out for something more useful. A kind word or two. Hey I did a good job – yes I can do better with time. Talk to yourself the way your want to be treated.
The new year typically brings with it a set of ‘resolutions’ – changes we want to make. Sometimes they last a short time and others longer. For many of us they simply don’t last! Change starts with us an individual. For lasting results we have to be real – have a goal or steps to get to where we would like to be.
Fitness is a steady process. For lasting fitness and changes we have to take steps – gradually. Your body as is – is an amazing gift. Everyday it gets you through each part of your life, when you are asleep it goes into auto mode keeping you alive and well. When you get sick it fights for you and when you are well helps you feel good – more energy. Its a complex system of many parts that we take for granted.
Look at your feet! They get us to walk every day, to run, to step, to avoid crashing into someone. They help us drive our car, catch our bus or train, exercise, swim, they wait patiently as you attend work waiting for you to stand up and move again. They are a huge part of our body system and many times the only thoughts we give them is when we kick our toes or put our shoes on.
Fitness is as individual as you! No one can wave a magic wand and say “there you go”. A one size fits all approach to getting well and stronger. Every body shape, every age, every person is unique. Fitness needs to be fun – something you enjoy doing.
I know what it is like when you are feeling yuck and no energy. You feel about as inspired as a peace of burnt bread! You just want to curl up go back to sleep. You get up you feel sluggish and bloated. Still you get up and move – nature has a way of doing that every morning. You may not feel like making the coffee and even after drinking it – slow to get going. Its ok we have days like this!
Then there are the great days you bounce out of bed feeling great! A new day awesome new ideas and things to explore. Then the days inbetween which are a mix mash of many emotions and experiences. Fitness is about being real – being you! Find something you enjoy, try something new – learn to accept that reflection in the mirror. Change takes time and we are energy beings – that is another story!
Everyone imagines the joy of being loved and wanted so desperately. Girls long for the vampiric type of love portrayed in novels and guys may want a woman who worships the ground he walks on. Neither are real or helpful yet this is what our society bombards us with on a daily basis. You have to have to fit into a particular mould to be happy – own certain things, etc, reality it’s a load of nonsense! Yes it’s nice to have the ideal image and money, however, real happiness starts within you!
It’s not about bouncing from one relationship to another. Yes the first fluctuations of love are awesome – when the emotions die down, its time to move onto the next one. Except you still have to live in your own skin – look at your reflection In the mirror. If you are not happy now – that will not change unless you do some work for you!
I am learning to be happy in my own skin – own the body, emotions, memories, choices and more I have made over time. Own that the past is my creation, today being explored and the future to come. That what I want to do is my responsibility – I create my own reality.
Some things have happened that were extremely confrontational for me. The past and today collided – yet looking into them at a different angle – I shocked myself with my reactions. As we age we are vastly different from our 20’s or younger years in more ways than one.
I found myself thinking being more open minded, not so insecure in my own skin knowing that no matter what happens I will be ok – so will the other people. Yes, hurt is there, a bit of disbelief, then a question of if they are so unhappy why not do something about it? Taking a different approach – works out well – no one needs to be a doormat or let doubt and rage creep in. I made some classic stuff ups growing up and still do – yet to this day – I have no regrets as I would not be the person I am.
I wonder what drove this person to their actions – what the payoff is? Still no one can live a person’s life for them – you need to let the air in and change happen. I am stronger because of this and appreciate myself and others more than before. Sometimes you have to lose yourself to discover who you are. You need to give the people you love the freedom to live life – for them to risk and you as well as its natural. Sometimes routine kicks in and you wonder “is this it”?
I see many of you going through pain and confrontation – there is light at the other side of the darkness. The pendulum swings again – the sun comes up and moon rises. You breathe change with every breath you take. Hang in there – the people who hurt you with their actions, the people you have hurt – will all be ok with time.
Everyone is our teacher and there is always something to learn. Living your dreams takes courage and every day you have courage when you open your eyes to face they day. To when you go to bed and beyond in your dreams.
Do you ever have those days when you feel squashed flat – like a balloon that loses its air slowly? You want to float and bring joy to others at the party, and somehow keep deflating. Our energy rises and sets all the day. Like the sun setting and rising, the sun and moon passing each other into the day and night.
I have found a song that helps you “rise” up and bring hope plus inspiration.
I refer to “Mojo” as energy. What happens when your mojo takes a dive and the tank is empty? How can you refill it when you are dragging through the day as it is?
First I stop and breathe. The art of breathing is so important and many of us forget that we can use this to calm and refresh ourselves. No matter where we are in the busy day of life you can stop, shrug your shoulders, close your eyes, take a deep breath and let your cares be gone for a moment or two.
If we breathe shallow it feels like an asthma attack, when you have exercised to long and struggle to get the breathe in or even an anxiety attack. So no matter whether you are sitting in a chair at a desk, in a high rise, a office, a cafe, school or even driving your car. You can get your mojo back with a good calming breath.
It doesn’t take long before you will feel better and your body will have more energy!